Published 2024-11-04
tag(s): #random-thoughts
Yesterday, I voted to the first time as a citizen of the United States.
Even as I handed the lady my driver's license, I could feel a knot in my stomach, and it was hard to contain the tears as I stood in the (relative) privacy of the voting booth, with its little curtain.
I grew up in Argentina, and was born in 1983, the same year that democracy returned to the
country. I can look at the state of Argentinian politics with a good mixture of puzzlement and
disdain[1], but as it is often said, democracy is the worst form of
government, except for all the others
.
So whoever "the people" choose, for whichever (misguided or not) reasons, that's who will
govern the country. Something we didn't take for granted in a nation where the good chunk of
the 20th century was under the rule of the military.
And being a kid of the Argentinian 80s and 90s, a lot of our civics education drilled into our heads the importance of voting, and being active participants in the democratic process. Voting is the very least you should do as a citizen. After all, for us, the memory of the times when society was stuck with totalitarianism was very fresh: we could hear the stories directly from our parents.
The first time I voted (legislative elections in 2021) I was above all, nervous. But I also
had this rush of emotion, of being part of something bigger than me. Even when elections
stopped being a novelty, that feeling never went away.
And even those times I was disenchanted with politics[2], walking into the
"cuarto oscuro"[3] felt equal parts responsibility and opportunity.
There wasn't a time where I didn't get a bit emotional.
We moved to the USA in 2014. Back then I was still very much on top of the news and watching the 2016 election cycle happen was pretty disheartening. And disappointing.
Of course, I still like living here, and I am hopeful for the future of the USA[4]. But being a "resident alien" - or was a I still "just a visa holder"? - when Trump is elected president, is not for the faint of heart. You look at all you are trying to build and realize it all could go away in any minute. You also feel less welcomed than before, although to be fair (and luckily) we never felt that from people directly. Yet, the constant headlines and rhetoric about immigration were quite overwhelming.
So yesterday, walking to the voting place, I had this mix of emotions. Not unlike voting in
Argentina, and amplified by being yet another step in our long journey to being "true
citizens" of this country. Visa paperwork, residents, then citizens, then getting our
passports...and now voting.
Everything that makes our move more definitive, even after all these years, conjures the
strongest emotions. Hope for what lies forward and a dash of sadness for what was left behind.
And it's been over 10 years! I wonder if those feelings will ever go away.
I think the biggest conclusion to take away from all this, is that sometimes I can be a bit
too emotional...
:)